Parent Up by Kelly Rippon

Author:Kelly Rippon
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Sourcebooks
Published: 2020-08-26T00:00:00+00:00

Chapter 6

The Influence of Grace

grace

/ɡrās/

noun

courteous goodwill; refinement of movement

Synonyms: elegance, pose, charm, politeness, calm

Antonyms: stiffness, clumsiness, indecency, offensiveness

Somewhere in between the pull and the push of life resides grace. It is the balance of opposing forces. Grace is necessary to effectively mediate the unpretentiousness of humility with the ego-hungry needs of pride. It tempers fear with courage, softens hate with love, and reveals the satisfaction in the stillness of observing, while quieting the impulsive desire to react or engage. Grace is the state of self and social awareness where lessons are learned.

As a parent, I did my best to keep it together and tried not to overreact. Having six kids, each two years apart, presented unique challenges for me. Like most parents, I sometimes struggled to meet the needs of a toddler one minute and then abruptly shift to meet the emotional demands of a teenager the next. Just when we think we have it all figured out, when it all seems to progress in a graceful balance, we are humbled by reality. We as parents quickly learn the fundamental truths that no two children are alike and no two experiences play out identically.

I remember that when my oldest child, Adam, was born, my friends were complaining about their children climbing out of high chairs, jumping out of cribs, and diving out of strollers. I thought, What kind of incompetence is that? I convinced myself that I must be pretty good at this mother thing. My baby sleeps through the night, loves his high chair, and is so patient. Those mothers must not know what they’re doing.

Then I had a second child.

Growing Grace

My second child, Tyler, showed me a different side of parenting. He showed me that babies could climb out of their cribs at eight months, walk at nine months, and run at ten months. By the time he was a year old, he was able to remove all the knobs from our furniture. By the time he was two, he proved that it was possible to successfully communicate without uttering a single word. He pointed, nodded, or screeched, and we all knew what he was talking about. Like a master learner, he observed, analyzed, and conceptualized new ideas. On my porch, I wrote that he was a creator, and that was because of his ability to figuratively shave the edges off a square peg in order to fit it into a round hole. From a young age, he could argue an issue from all positions, and he used this skill to advance his cause of the day.

High intellectual ability is an advantage when it connects a teen to compete in an adult academic environment, but it can delude a young person who is used to having all the right answers in the classroom into thinking that they have all the answers to life. There is often a maturity gap. Much grace is warranted to keep them steady and moving forward. By the time Tyler was in high school, he was dually enrolled in college study.

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